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Sunday, Jun. 08, 2003 / 3:04 p.m. ~Mad Swank Bossa Nova, Baby~ Right now I'm not at the FOX Theatre seeing "Spirited Away". I felt I had to stay home, to recuperate, to rest, to relax, to hopefully accomplish something, eventually. Maybe laundry, so I have something clean to wear to work tomorrow. And maybe dishes, washing them anyway, because it would be nice to have clear counters, and clean pots, pans, what have you, instead of grabbing dirty ones and giving them the once over with a paper towel so I can reuse them. I can be slovenly when left to my own 'devices'. Quick online research showed me that I not only spelled Andie MacDowell's name wrong yesterday (she's a 'Mac', not a 'Mc'), but the name of the movie I watched was indeed "Crush", it just wasn't the "Crush" synopsized when I clicked on 'info' on the cable. No Alicia Silverstone, wrong film. That happens from time to time when they show a film with a title shared by other films. I think it happened with "Girl On the Bridge" or something similar. But, the reviews I read shared my opinions, good movie, beautiful photography/scenery, great acting by Ms MacDowell, but flawed story. Still, I enjoyed it. I told Nelson about it on the phone last night, when he started telling me, "It's not because I'm drunk, and I don't care about the age thing.....", "Hey, I saw this movie the other night, it was Andie MacDowell and she played this headmistress having this affair with this 25 year old and she was 40 and he was 25, and it's not because I'm drunk either...." I drank two $10 Cosmopolitans, and they were WORTH every penny. And I looked good, after changing my clothes four times, or more, and I danced, like I didn't care who was watching, because that's how I dance, and only later do I ask myself, What if I look really stupid when I dance?, and Kukla got drunk quickly and sat in her chair. Even with repeated beggings from me, and every man in the place, well, almost, to get up and dance, which she finally did at one point, she sat. Poor thing. What a trooper. She gets up so early, and she skipped dinner (so did I, honey, so did I), but she gets worn out, I guess, and it's surprising because she's this avid walker freak, always goes power walking, always seems to be on the go, etc., etc., but she goes out and just sits, immobilized. Yes, yes, it was after she polished off her first Margarita, and I tasted it, it was strong, and it was before the one the one guy bought her, of which I drank half (follow me, two Cosmos, half a Margarita, I danced, I had energy, I skipped dinner, but I'd slept until 11:30, she was up around 6:30 - could that be the only difference?), but before the Italian Bossa Nova King started mixing and spinning we had fun talking, we were lively, we loved the people watching, and I was glad it was mixed, we had the Asian Americans, we had the African Americans, and we had the European Americans, we even had the Gay Americans. It was awfully American, but considering we were in America, that's not bad. Today I ordered the Italian Bossa Nova King's two CDs. Have to hear more. Oh, I danced and danced. I'd sit down, I'd ask Kukla if she was alright, I'd jump out of my chair and start dancing, I'd turn to the guy next to me and ask him, "How are these people sitting? How can you NOT dance to this?", and he'd shake his head, lost in it. I danced over to the DJ area, I made eye contact with HIM, he looked at me, finally, I smiled, big, love the music, baby, bossa nova baby, baby, and he smiled back. Sort of like the "nod" in "Groove". Yeah, you're taking me places and I'm loving the ride. Kukla? Eh, I don't know. I really think it's because she can't mix alcohol with no food and not enough sleep. Although when she came to my place she was wired! She was talking a mile a minute, oh, she was so excited, she said, she couldn't wait, she said, and once there, she was bubbly and lively, but she did want to order food, and they'd stopped serving. It could've been different. But I amaze myself the way I can go like that. I'm about 6 years older than she is, I hadn't eaten anything but popcorn all day, and I drank more, and still. Does this make me better? No, not at all, I'm just a fiend. And an Aries, we're like that. Loved it, we had a good time. I hope she made it to Church okay today! I slept. Actually, I woke up around 8:00, after going to sleep after 4:00, and I almost couldn't get back to sleep, but it was severe dehydration, lack of food, too much used smoke inhaled, and I eventually went back to sleep. I'm rehydrated, I've eaten, I'm good. Right, so Nelson had called, he'd left a message saying it might be his last time calling me, he thinks I'm mad, he notices I'm avoiding him, he doesn't understand, he's hurting, I didn't even hear the message, just his voice, before I picked up the phone, 3:00 a.m., a bit 'tight', we might say, and called him back, and he was equally 'tight', drinking Screwdrivers, and thusly we ironed it out, he drunkenly told me again how much I mean to him, how he loves that I'm a protestor (so I told him how I've given up, the people don't have a voice, we've been silenced), and we talked about the flag desecration amendment and the loss of free speech and our 'inalienable rights' and my letters to my State Representative and etc., etc., and he told me again how much I mean to him, how glad he was I called, how if we ever meet in person we're going to have incredible sex, for hours. 'If'. See, I've given up hope of that too. He doesn't know it, I can't tell him, but he no longer has my trust, I can't feel about him the way I once did, that's long gone. I let him think whatever he wants, and I love to hear someone tell me he loves me, as long as I listen with one ear, as long as my brain knows what it's really about, it feels good, but I have a level head, and maybe it is the age difference....... So, I couldn't make it to the FOX, I didn't try, I could have, but I didn't want to try. I want to sit, or lie, I want to drink water, and I wanted to order CDs online. Done. We had fun, last night was crazy, crazy fun, mad fun, at a mad swank club, and we were hot, Kukla had the 'nothing left to the imagination' thing going on, which got her free drinks, and me a courtesy free drink which I declined, and I was 'subtle', tattoos peeking out of my short sleeved shirt, me in all black, she in all black, we looked good. I danced, she sat, we had fun. And Nelson loves me, misses me, wants me, needs me. What could be more fun? Fun, fun, fun. More Lifetime Movies, "Guiding Light" on tape, and when my CDs arrive, I'll dance to Bossa Nova all around my living room. I have a mad desire to hear Elvis' song, "Bossa Nova, Baby" right now.... Cost of the War in Iraq
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