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Monday, Jul. 22, 2002 / 6:29 p.m. ~Can You Feel It?~ I'm sitting today. Can't really concentrate to read. Just sitting, looking around, headphones on ("18"), headphones off. Phone rings, answer, assist, hang up, sit, look around, headphones on, off, repeat. Read a paragraph or two. Phone rings. This is today. Constant thoughts of tomorrow. What would you do if you knew you might meet the object of your distant obsession? He's distant, the obsession is near. How long have I been going on and on about him? Since I joined his message boards last October? Since I began reading his journal? Was that in October as well? Reading him, anticipating his album, buying the album, listening to it incessantly, criticizing it, loving it, listening to it now even. Even now. Buying more of his music, reading him, reading about him, listening, always listening, reading, listening and reading. And tomorrow I'll stand feet from him. Do you have any idea what it feels like? Like meeting Anthony Bourdain, or Loudon Wainwright III felt. Except multiplied by maybe 100. Read the boards at Moby.com, read the stories of the people who've met him on this tour so far. So far, so many. Waiting for him by his tour bus, going backstage to his dressing room, hanging out, getting things signed, talking, all of them on this cloud called "9". So I'm anxious. I'm nervous. And I cannot wait. I mean I will, but I cannot. Last night, and I wish I knew what time, Norma got in bed and threw herself at me. Waking me up, meowing in my face, licking my arm, trying to get under the covers with me, turning her back to me finally and practically sitting on my face. This is not her normal behavior. Lately she sleeps on the floor, either on the area rug or on the carpet next to me, just like a dog. Sometimes I get out of bed and step on her, inadvertently of course. But at some point last night she jumped up on the bed and got right in my face, looking at me, yelling at me, telling me something and I have no idea what. And the licking, what was that about? My arm? It was bizarre, not like her at all. Mark says maybe I was talking in my sleep, maybe I called out to her and she was simply responding. How would I know? I haven't slept with anyone in years, I don't even know if I talk in my sleep. Or she woke from a dream and had to see me, had to tell me she loves me. It was so strange though, it still sticks with me. I saw Lulu rushing in after her lunch break earlier, and she was late, her food in bags, almost running to the time clock, but insisting I walk ahead of her, so I let her go, and she half smiled at me, and I at her, and for a brief moment I was reminded of what it was like when I liked her. "Jam For the Ladies"� oh my god, have I mentioned how excited I am? Everyone on the boards says Moby goes crazy playing this song in concert. Tomorrow. Here's where I say, Oh, no, what if my car breaks down?! I'll take a cab. Okay. I'm set. And if I don't meet him, that's cool. There will be another time. That's healthy, right? This song will always make me think of Branford, of listening to it at his place, on his laptop. I don't have much else to write (oh, you know THAT is not true!), besides, "Gee, I'm so excited, I might get to meet Moby!", and sit here sounding like a 16 year old. I guess it could be worse. I saw a good movie last night, "Babe II: Pig in the City". I LOVED it! My favorite line was the lady chimp saying to Thelonius (the old simian in the green smoking jacket), "You're an orangu-thingie". Maybe you had to be there, but it was very funny and the special effects and animal wrangling were incredible. There were even some fairly close calls, a dog almost drowning in a river, dangling over a bridge by his foot stuck in a chain, a goldfish knocked out of his bowl, flopping around on the bare floor amidst shards of glass (the bowl broken by a very bad person), and a little paralyzed dog in one of those doggie wheelchair things, lying sideways on the ground, seemingly dead, a quick vision of him in doggie heaven chasing butterflies in a flowery meadow� that last one had me near tears. Why? I don't know, it was what I hope for all doggies who die. Tonight, if all goes well, I should be seeing a Billy Wilder double feature at the fabulous Fox Theatre: "Some Like it Hot" and "The Apartment". Crazy to see a double feature on a Monday night, especially the night before I go see Moby, but I'm taking Wednesday off to recover. Oooo, excitement abounds. Can you feel it? Full Moon week too!!! I bought new Sharpies at Publix at lunch. Just so I can maybe get 'his' autograph on some CD liner notes tomorrow. I put all the ones I have together, about 8 albums! I wonder if he'd sign them all. Reminds me of getting James McNair to sign my collection of his single subject cookbooks, about 20 or more total. He was really flattered, and yes, he signed them all. Cost of the War in Iraq
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