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Friday, Feb. 28, 2003 / 1:25 p.m. ~Body Image, etc.~ I don't think Friday is ever bad. Someone asked me how I am, earlier, and I felt so good, I responded that I was great and how could I not be? The weeks keep passing, and they all start the same and end the same, with minor differences in between. Two of our staff are heading to Mardi Gras. I asked one to get me a fridge magnet, something Mardi Gras-y, or New Orleans-y, or Louisiana-y. She says she got a crawfish magnet for someone last year, so my hopes are now high. I love souvenirs. I think I have a souvenir fetish. Today is Brandy's (formerly known as 'the new girl') last day. She got a permanent job, seeing as how here she was just a 'temp', and she says it pays more, so good for her, but bad for me. As if in a room filled with men, gravitating eventually to the only other woman, here in a room filled with people of a different race I gravitate to those who are like me. I wish we had a large variety. White, black, purple, green, men, women, maybe a cat and a dog, but it's always been awfully homogenous here. Black. Female. So, I'll miss her. Not just because she's like me, but because she's cute, young, vibrant, energetic, filled with life. She has my phone number and email address, we'll see if she stays in touch. As odd as it sounds, I won't make the effort. Lately, I tend to let people go. It's easier. But, speaking of that, Sandy called me at work yesterday. I returned from a break (during which I'd been perusing the "Mr Rogers' Neighborhood" web site, which is VERY cool, by the way) to find a message from him on my voice mail. I felt an odd mixture of emotions just hearing his voice. He was someone I'd let go. He said he had been thinking about me and wanted to touch base, see how I am, etc. I called him right back, but we only chatted briefly. It was great to talk politics with someone� and it was nice to talk to him. I honestly think that in spite of everything, including the all-important loss of respect for him I experienced during our last trip to protest in D.C., I still really am attracted, in an indefinable way. Brandy and I were talking piercings, as she has her tongue pierced, and somehow I expressed my desire for a clitoral piercing. Which led to a conversation about body hair and shaving, and it turns out Brandy would like to have her entire body lasered free of hair. I was telling her that I've come to accept mine. I'm very accepting of my physical form, now, but it wasn't always like this. In adolescence I went through periods, stages, of hating almost every part of my body. My nose was too big, one breast is smaller than the other, I had acne (I still do), I hated my belly (though skinny, I often had a little 'pooch'), I had too much facial hair, I wanted straight hair on my head, I wanted blonde hair, not so dark, I didn't want to look 'exotic', I wanted to look average, more like the American girl next door, I wanted to be taller, I wanted no facial hair, and etc., etc. Now, in my 40s, I just don't care about any of that. I'm who I am. This is me. But, I like to add some decorations here and there, some fun little accoutrements just for me, hence the tattoos. And now I'm seriously thinking of a clitoral ring. Brandy says women tend to have orgasms as they're being pierced there. There. Pierced. Imagine that. It's just a thought for now, but my birthday is coming up, it could be a sort of 'treat'� we'll see. On my way to lunch in a few, I'll catch the Yahoo! Headlines and upload this. On the way home every day at lunch, and on my way back to work, there is a person wearing a Winnie the Pooh costume holding a sign advertising a Brazilian buffet. I don't get the connection, Pooh - Buffet - Brazilian food, but it's eye catching all right. One day I should stop in. Today the person was walking with one hand holding a little girl's hand. I've realized we have a lot of Brazilian restaurants in this neighborhood. Cost of the War in Iraq
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