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Thursday, Mar. 13, 2003 / 11:00 a.m. ~On the Fence~ One thing I�ve always disliked about �the new boy�, who shall now be known as �Jeff�, is his lack of social graces. I haven�t seen him since I came in to pick up my Girl Snout (term appropriated from Trouble) cookies, and that was very brief. He simply won�t make eye contact. I actually missed him, strange as that seems to write, to say, to think, and I walked in today and said, �Jeff�s here!�, but he didn�t even acknowledge my existence. That�s just rude. He wasn�t here yesterday, I wasn�t here Monday and Tuesday, and now, the first time we have to talk, to �catch up�, even if it�s just what we�ve been watching on TV, and so far I don�t exist to him. Fine. And know what? Later he�ll have had his two or three Mountain Dews and he�ll be all over me for conversation. Stupid fucker is getting my back. Literally. (Also, he�s a Cancer, incredibly moody, way too moody for me, moodier than I am!) Moving on� Thing about these big marches/demonstrations in Washington is the people. If you�re a passionate liberal, if you have any sort of edge, if you like progressive types, hippie types, it�s your crowd. It�s my crowd, mostly, and every time I go (five times now), I see people I wish I knew. It increases the longing to connect, for me, and there is no satisfaction. I woke up today thinking it might be Saturday, I wasn�t really sure, and all I could think about was sleeping late, but then I imagined not sleeping, being on the fucking bus again, and I said, No, I can�t do it, I just can�t do it again. If I lived within 50 miles, maybe more, I would simply drive in, for the day, nothing would keep me from it, but to get on the bus, ride overnight, stop in the same exact place in the morning, wait for everyone to eat, wait for everyone to wash up and get back on the bus, sleep on the way in, exhausted getting off the bus, marching, looking like I�ve slept on a bus, seeing all those people from all over the country, the world, wishing I knew so many of them, attracted to various and sundry young men, not even talking to anyone (too shy, and no one ever approaches me), getting back on the bus (the fucking bus), stopping at the exact same place on the way back, the little strip that has 6 or more restaurants, waking up to eat, when I�d rather just sleep and get home earlier. No. But I got email yesterday saying there were only 20 spaces left on BUS NUMBER FOUR, and there might be a BUS NUMBER FIVE. Holy shit. We�ve never had that many people interested in going to D.C. to protest. Suddenly everyone is into this. I�ve been doing it since September �01, but now people seem to care. Like they didn�t give a fuck about Afghans, but they care about Iraqis. Where is the logic in that? I can�t make up my mind, and I�m not sure a last minute jumping on the bus thing is a good idea for the cats or for me. There�s been no planning at all on my part, just a lot of �Hell No, I�m not gonna go!�, not anymore. It�s too strenuous, and last time sucked so incredibly badly, and I came home and got so incredibly sick I had to miss two days work, and I coughed for like three weeks, or was it four? Sandy said, �It won�t be so cold this time. I�ll carry your backpack for you.�, and other things, trying to get me to go, but I really don�t want to go �with� him. You�d think going to D.C. wouldn�t be such a big deal, but it actually is when you live this far away. Much to consider. Leaving that topic� Yesterday was a nice slow return to work. Jeff was off, as I said, I sat and read, Listerine bounced off the walls (in a manic phase, I guess), it was not bad at all. But at lunch there was some huge accident on the Interstate, lanes closed in both directions (!), traffic diverted to the �surface roads�, tractor trailers, etc., and YIKES! Luckily I heard about it before I attempted to leave for home, but I considered it a challenge, managed to make it home anyway, using unused back roads, but didn�t have much time there, and my ISP�s email server was down, so I couldn�t check email, wasn�t hungry because of the huge meal I ate Tuesday night, so really I just grabbed the free weekly for Listerine and me, and drove back, again down back roads. The traffic was insane, but I made it (even managed to pay my power bill!). Go me! Then after work I was totally exhausted, and I can attribute this to lack of sustenance, but it was a struggle just to wash the week�s worth of dishes accumulated in my sink so I could cook. I didn�t think I could stand another minute, really, but after some bocconcini with little grape tomatoes and olive oil, herbs (Mmmmmm�!) and chips (I know? Chips?), and �Star Search�, I got up and cooked an amazing vegetarian pasta sauce. Zucchini, yellow squash, broccoli, onions, lots of garlic, mushrooms, and a jar of organic tomato sauce (made with organic garlic, organic tomatoes, organic onions, organic love). Incredibly good. I brought some in for Listerine (she asked yesterday), and froze the rest. I hope it freezes okay. Another reason NOT to go to D.C., I have too much fresh food I�ve got to eat. The sun is shining, but I can see a front moving in from the west. That�s the thing about this location, it�s on a hill and all the trees were razed a long time ago, it�s big sky country now. As usual, everything remains to be seen. But I could stand to go back to bed, not much is happening here, in the cube, 9:45 a.m. cubicle time. Fatboy Slim is in my ears, the EW is on the desk, must go read now. Cost of the War in Iraq
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