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Wednesday, Jul. 09, 2003 / 3:59 p.m. ~"Funny, That", I Say That Too~ On my way back to work after lunch I saw cars headed south with their headlights on. The sky was filled with big cumulus clouds, no rain in sight, a slight breeze made it seem not as hot as the 89 or 90 I know it is out there, and the sun was shining, but those of us traveling north hit this freak cloudburst, we could see it up ahead like a swarm of locusts or something. It was really bizarre, and the worst thing was the reaction of my fellow drivers. They nearly stopped dead. It was only rain, just rain, water falling from the sky, cloud vapor condensed, released, no big deal, but we slowed to 40 mph in a 65 zone. Oy, the sarcastic diatribe spewing from my mouth! It was funny, and I thought that if Mark had been there he would have laughed at me. And I would have laughed at him laughing at me, and thus laughed at me too. And for a second or two I missed making him laugh. Since before I got the big lizard tattoo on my arm I�ve had this weird sort of growth on that arm, and I�m guessing it�s just a wart, just one of those things, a jutting out of skin, and it looks like I could just pull it off, or cut it off, but I know better so I�ve just left it there. But it takes away from the tattoo, it�s just above it and I want it gone. So, diagnosing it as a wart, in my own way of self-diagnosing, I went to the Wal Mart and bought the Compound W (am I just begging for Google hits?), and never having used the stuff before, merely succumbing to the grand scheme that is television advertising, I followed directions and applied gingerly, both Monday night and yesterday morning. And then my arm started to hurt, like I�d strained the tendons, so I figured I�d done too much typing, and late last night when I began to massage my arm, I felt this huge lump in my arm. And that�s my story. I�m sticking to it. I don�t know the salicylic acid in the wart gunk and the lump in the back of the arm, way subcutaneous, in the triceps region, are related, but it makes the most sense, and me being the most logical sort, well, this is my theory. The wart stays (I discontinued use of said product), the lump must go away. It�s very painful, especially when I use those muscles, those triceps muscles. Seriously. Punching out at the time clock earlier? Ow. Typing right now, unh. It�s a lump, a painful lump. A cyst? Appearing quite suddenly and painfully? Who the hell knows, but all this talk of warts and lumps and cysts is making me queasy. Makes me sound like some ugly freak too. Which I am, but I don�t need to write about it here. Good god, y�all. Hah, interrupted by phone call, as I am at work after all, and answering the phone when it rings is one of my job responsibilities � this caller, a woman, just said something I say sometimes, in error, �You too�. I said, �Thank you for calling�, and she said, �You too, er, you�re welcome�, and it was awkward for a brief moment. Fun with phones! I think that�s all I have for now. Just another entry from the cube. Big TV tonight, got the surfer show, �Boarding House � North Shore�, which I love, love, love, and the new �Big Brother�, which is weird, because last night at the end of the big season four premiere we saw scenes from upcoming episodes, and how is this possible?! They�ve never done this before, taped a bunch of it to show later, not quite like this. I feel hornswoggled. Hoodwinked. Deceived, at least. It�s supposed to be live, or at least live-ish. Harrumph. Oh, one more thing before I proofread and �save as� to upload later, after I eat lunch at home I brush my teeth, as I am all about the dental hygiene, and I apply cocoa butter to my lips, on account of I am addicted to lip balms, and I give Norman big hugs, because she is so fucking squeezably soft, better than any four roll pack of Charmin could ever be (could this entry be more rife with product placement?!), and I kiss her, and that other cat too, and well, I leave with cat hairs on my lips. It�s funny, I think. Like someone who�s just gone down on his/her woman, plucking pubes from his/her tongue and teeth, I�m lifting cat hair from the cocoa butter on my lips on the drive back to work. Funny, that. Cost of the War in Iraq
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