Tuesday, May. 07, 2002 / 3:35 p.m.

~I've Gone Back~

It's 1985, I'm back from Europe, I live in my first apartment on my own, with three cats. I have a father, a brother, a sister in law, a best friend who used to be my lover. I'm happy, but I'm lonely.

I had an affair in Rome, and I'm convinced I'm in love. I think of him in spite of myself. I'm living in my fantasies.

I shop at the Farmers Market, I cook, I eat, I watch cable television, I read books and order from catalogs, and I am social. I date men, go to dinners, I listen to music loud in the middle of the day.

I'm reading my journal from 1985. I was 24 years old. My father remarried. We didn't get along, he and I. Everything was so different. I'm reading it like it's a novel, it's someone else's life, but I can vaguely remember living it. I tell Lulu and she says I should be a writer, and I say yes, I should.

I tell her about my resume, how I need to create a new one, a false one, one that will land me an actual job. She is working on her business proposals, she wants to go into business for herself, and I want to leave here.

What do I do when I finish reading this journal? It reminds me of "Felicity", the new plot twist wherein she goes back in time, but she is as she is now. She knows she's gone back, but everyone else is the same as they were. I'm back and I can see it all through my eyes now.

This is a strange day. I feel strange. Ms. Being Here Now has gone back in time.

Cost of the War in Iraq
(JavaScript Error)

Run, Kitty, Run!

Previous - Next

New - 2012 - 2009 - 2008 - 2007 - 2006 - 2005 - 2004 - 2003 - 2002 - 2001 - Profile - Contact - Notes - Rings - Diaryland - Favourite Entries - ReadMe - Surveys - Random Entry

Recent Entries:

It Was 40 Years Ago Today - 9:44 a.m. , Friday, Oct. 12, 2012

Dead Black Cat - 9:07 a.m. , Wednesday, Jan. 25, 2012

As Seen From Outer Space - 1:07 a.m. , Saturday, Dec. 05, 2009

I Survived to Tell the Tale - 7:29 a.m. , Friday, Sept. 18, 2009

Reading My Life - 12:55 p.m. , Saturday, Sept. 12, 2009

Happy Kitty

My Diary Was Reviewed at Ms Lovejoy's - Get Yours Reviewed Too!

Registered I was a nominee