Saturday, Jul. 13, 2002 / 7:09 p.m.

~Up and Running, and Obsessed as Usual!!!!~

I'm obsessed with this new computer. I'm on it now, but it wasn't easy getting here.

I inserted an AOL disk I'd gotten from my employer for Christmas last year, last night, and I am now a temporary AOL subscriber. Fool that I am.

All I had to do was call my ISP to find out that the password I was so absolutely certain was correct was in fact not correct at all, and that was no glitch, it was me being stupid.

Password re-set and I'm set. I have a fun AOL user ID though, so I may stay with it a bit.

So much to say. So much is happening, just me here in this room. Installing Netscape 4.79 last night, going on to bed while it downloaded because it was around 2:00 in the morning. And CallWave and the latest ICQ, which is really cool - it not only notifies of new email, it shows the text of the email in its own little window, so I don't have to open my Netscape email program.

There is so much room to store everything. I loaded my digital camera's software from the CD that came with it. Everything is pretty groovy, so far, but all my email is still on the other PC, and my Sound files, which I desperately want so I might feel more "at home" here.

And it's funny because it's the same monitor in the same spot, like it's the same computer, but it's not. It's faster. It's better, clearly. But basic settings are eluding me still. I thought I changed the font size, but this is teeny right now. And the monitor is too dark, even after changing the monitor settings on the actual monitor. Are there more I don't know about? Why should it be darker?

I talked on the phone with Mark for about two hours, not even peeing or eating. I only had washed my face and brushed my teeth, drunk my coffee. I've been obsessed, driven, a woman with a goal, since I woke up. Since last night really.

I can't believe I had the wrong password. And that Windows Help site was so good, told me that error 691 meant I needed to reinstall some file or other, and it was all a big glitch, but it was just as it said, my username or my password was incorrect. Why couldn't I believe it? Oh, the nice Derrick at my ISP's tech support line was so helpful, didn't deride me, nor chide me, only helped, so humbly, so succintly, so professionally. A joy.....

I must eat. But what? I want real food, I crave real food, but I can't imagine not staying right here to finish what I've begun.

I now need to log off and log back on to the old computer, try to download my email folders, my Sounds files, anything else I feel I MUST have on this thing. And I'll miss the old one. I do already. I have a corncob cursor now, not my blue lightning bolt. It's just so different, yet almost exactly the same.

Oh, oh, I need Webshots too!!! Got to have my photo wallpapers!!! I can transfer those files too once I download the program.

But I cannot explain the joy of having new versions of all these programs. It's most excellent. And the download speed, going from a 14.4 modem to the 56K, well, you know, don't you? Yes. Imagine me when I get DSL!!! When, not if.

On top of all of this excitement, I get email from Hermione out West, and she has her own news..... she found out, in quite a roundabout way, from her drunken father as she called him to wish him a Happy Birthday, that her mother had a child before she was born, and she gave him up for adoption! Hermione is NOT an only child!!!

She is maybe 34 years old, has an almost 4 year old daughter of her own, she is an only child (or so thought), her daughter is so far an only child, her mother (as far as we know) is an only child.... now this. Imagine. Just imagine.

I wrote to her from my new AOL account, because I couldn't get online any other way, so I need to see if she writes back to that address. Or this. I need to know what happens next. I can feel some of what she must be feeling, across all these miles. She wrote such a fervent letter, sent out to her friends on her email list, and we all really do love her and her little family so much. She will get an outpouring, including mine, of support and well wishes. This will help, I think.

Okay. I need to breathe. I need to watch "Big Brother 3", which is really good, by the way. I love that show, and it's better than it's been. The editing has improved, I think. All the right Reality TV elements are present, it's perfect, so far, after only 2 shows.

I need to eat. Maybe I'll order something delivered, or get Thai later. I want real food. I want to relax. I think I can now, now that I've made this effort.

I am fairly amazed at all I've done, although I do wish I'd contacted my ISP last night instead of loading the AOL...... I don't know whether to cancel it immediately, or keep it for the three free months. But really, for someone who is almost 100% self-taught when it comes to computers, I fucking rock!

And I'm so modest.

Oh, also, if you wanted to read about my meeting Anthony Bourdain, I found the entry and went back to yesterday's entry to link to it, so it's there - enjoy!

Cost of the War in Iraq
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