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Monday, Jul. 08, 2002 / 8:06 p.m. ~Why Must They Keep Growing?~ Fine, so I'm the only one who really liked the Souzhou entry from last March. So be it. I'm not here to be liked, I don't think. I'm having a couple of computer issues, and before I curse this thing too much I do need to remember that the big ugly box on the floor is another computer, which may just work better than this one, and I can find out if I simply go and buy a cheap keyboard. No big deal. Soon. I was in the middle of reading all the updated diaries on my voluminous "Buddy List" when things just stopped happening, so I had to reboot. And in so doing I came down with a headache. But it could be due to the day, in general. I'm at that point again, my nails are too long. Why can't they just stop growing? What is the point in them growing? Whose bright idea was this? That nails and hair should just keep growing and growing? Is there a purpose? All I can think is it's so that certain freaks can get into the Guinness Book of World Records by growing theirs, nails or hair, as long as possible. For me it's a constant chore, I can go a week or two then it's intolerable. Blech. Hard to be cheery when one is in pain with headache. I feel whiny. I'm sick of my glasses. I can't stand the feel of them pressed to my temples, the way the little plastic nose pieces slide down my nose if there's any trace of oil at all. I can't stand my CallWave Internet Answering Machine flashing ads at me (easy to remedy, I closed it), and I can't stand the way my ICQ remembers every request for authorization, asks me daily if I'll let so and so add me to her contact list, even though I said yes about a week ago. Fuck. PMS already? Jeez. Salt cravings, water retention, crabby, headache. Sounds like it. Too soon after that intense horny ovulation moment from the other day though. I think it's PPMS. Today the new/old Site Manager held a "floor meeting", told everyone on site that he is taking over, things will be different, we will have fun, but we will provide superior service to the Customer, the HUGE multinational Corporation, etc., and yada, yada, and blah, blah too. Well put though. He's a great guy, I think I always liked him, and I am glad he's back. But our Server is fucked, still. One week tomorrow since that big storm with all the lightning and the phones went down, and we logged off our PCs, came in the next day and nothing in our dept worked. Still, the calls are re-routed through the main switchboard, and they came fast and furious, incessant. Take one, another is leaving voice mail because your line is busy. Call back 20, 30 people, and while you're calling them back more are leaving voice mail. Nonstop. Technopop. (obscure Kraftwerk reference - bonus points if you know it!!!!) Anyway. So what. I hesitated to write about it at all. It's boring. It's become drudgery. I'm ashamed of our company for letting it go this long, for not being able to fix it. I thought we got a brand new Server last Summer....what happened? No surge protector? Really? That's fucking pitiful. Was it really struck by lightning? No, it was just a surge, right? What's the problem? So we worked. The gals talked, and I worked. Yes, that's what happened. I really miss the last two weeks, the reading, reading my book, listening to my Walkman. Lately I can't even open a book, can't even turn away from my phone. This is horrible. And amidst the manual Excel spreadsheet processing....the Printer Server went down!!! So we couldn't even print our documents! Fuck me. Oh yeah. But the calls kept coming. Voice mail. Return calls. Phone tag. Awful. Really. Wal Mart after work for motor oil, soaps, Calcium tablets and weird food. Banquet Frozen Dinners. Cheap. Salty. Really bad for you kind of stuff. Easy, quick. Rainforest beef. I know, I'm sorry. More bad Karma? Hey, I need to eat, I can't take the time to buy good stuff. I'm fucking tired, okay? I'm on my own here, there's no husband, no mom, no pop, no bestest friend, it's just me, and I have two cats to feed. Please, lordy, hep me feeds my chirrens!!! What? Right. So I came home and ate several Lay's Cool Dill Chips. Or is it California Cool Dill? Or Cool California Dill? Available for a Limited Time Only. Whatever. They're alright. This is so exciting. I can hardly stand it. Have I mentioned I hate the feel of my own fingernails once they grow beyond the pads of my fingers? Is that right? Pads? Hate it. It makes my skin crawl. I'm so cranky. The glasses. The fingernails. Aaarrrrgh. I was going to come home and watch "Moby in Scotland", whatever that is, on MTV 2, on tape rather, from early this morning, as I taped it, but I turned it on and it's just a "Senor Moby's House of Music" and I feel ripped off. I think I'm going to lie on the sofa, after I finish reading all these damn diaries. These damn diaries! Hah! Why do you people have to update so often? Can't you take a break? Can't you see I'm tired and whiny and cranky and my nails are too long, and I used to love when my mother would clip and file my nails for me.....it was the best. She'd finish and I'd say, "Don't stop". Same when she rubbed my head, smoothed my hair back from my face. The best. I went out with a guy who had me rubbing his head. Another Aries. Aries is symbolized by the head, you know. Yes. I'm through writing now. No wait, one more thing (grrr...these nails!), yesterday when I had nothing to eat here, and I was craving good healthy stuff (by the way, the Banquet meals are not my main food source, just something they sell at Wal Mart, for like 97 cents each, so I buy them, just to have on hand for when I'm lazy), I went in the kitchen and popped a can of albacore tuna, seasoned it with olive oil, some dill, lemon pepper seasoning, a splash of garlic flavored red wine vinegar, and some capers (!), and spooned that on top of two slices whole wheat bread lightly spread with mayo, then on top I put some sliced Muenster and broiled it. A yummy tuna melt! Olive oil, vinegar, capers. Mmmmm.....lemon juice would have been good too. Cost of the War in Iraq
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