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Friday, Jul. 25, 2003 / 6:40 p.m. ~I'm Fine With Me~ Bass coming from apartment downstairs, not sure which one. Wet head = cold head = big improvement after the pig fuck that was Friday 4:00 Interstate rush hour. Should I have gotten on at 3:30? I went looking for a car wash, found one, and it was packed. The others are all full serve, and I equate it thusly: I would not eat hard candy for 4 years, not brushing my teeth the entire time, and then go to a dental hygienest for a good cleaning. I would not take my car, which has not been washed in 4 years, and has just recently been spewed upon with waste/putrefaction, to a full serve car wash where live human beings have to stand and scrub it down, buff it, polish it up, in the hot, hot, hotter than LiveWeatherBug is currently indicating, heat. No, no, heat is hot. So, my day so far. Let's see... woke up about 10:00 a.m., maybe a little before, after going to sleep to "Girls, Girls, Girls", on WE, around 1:30, waking to an informercial for Dean Martin videos?, and feeling pretty good about that, and checked email, drank coffee, had a quick shower, gathered all my wristwatches, hoping to get new batteries, hoping to combine several errands and a movie into one trip into 'town', and left for an intown shopping center where I remembered an old watch/clock repair shop, run by an old watch/clock repairman, from years ago. Hot, hot, heat, traffic, at mid day, miserable, hot. And the shop is no longer there. Sad indeed. So many things have changed intown. Next to the duplex house where I lived for four years is now a HUGE multilevel stone house/apartment house/thing/monstrosity that is actually intriguing in its modern/old fashioned monstrosityness. What the hell is it? Apparently construction is still underway as well. Watch/clock repair place gone, gone, probably for years now. Past the Burger King that was near the duplex house where I used to live, boarded up now, a Burger King closed for business. Not that I ever ate there, but yeah, sure, once or three times. And the movie, "The Eye", finally, but I must have looked forward a bit too much to seeing it. It disappointed, and all I could think of during the first half, was "Art supply store for my Le Pens, car wash, home, try to avoid rush hour, favorite Chinese food nearby, but must eat expensive food purchased at Whole Foods/Farmers Market yesterday, I'm hungry, tomato and bocconcini when I get home, don't forget, Le Pens, I need more, art supply store is still there, not boarded up yet, thank god, and I've got to find a car wash, I think there's one near here, when is this movie going to keep me from thinking about my errands, why isn't this movie better than this?, it should be good, but it's just not, hmmmmm..., why isn't it good?", etc. The end was cool, but overall, eh. Art Supply/Office Supply store for my prized multicolored Le Pens, and a couple permanent, fine point, markers. Mmmmm... love pens. Car wash was too crowded, the self serve one I found. Traffic was hellacious, came home and peeled off sweat soaked clothes, showered, mmmmm......... feels much better. Ate bocconcini with tomato and lots of olive oil, some of my favorite dill seasoning, salt, freshly ground pepper. And now I've got to cook up some of the longaniza sausages I bought, well, both of them, with what? Mushrooms? Over angel hair? More tomato? Shiitake? Too many choices, or maybe just enough. "BB4". Maybe some Food Network. And maybe avoiding the blog site for a bit. I've irked some ire there. I've got in a bit of a pickle, a row of sorts. Yeah, yeah, I challenge people. I have a different way than most. I am unique, I make no apologies for being who I am. You don't like me, move on. I think we'll all move on there. I'll let them go, they'll let me go, and now I need to add some more blogs to read. Really, it's an old story, as old as the hills, old as my 42 years. You insult me, you piss me off, you offend me, you condescend to me (wait, is that right?, act condescending toward?), patronize me, etc., overall 'dis' me, I react. I will not kiss anyone's ass, and I don't trust anyone who is happy all the time, and who goes around hugging people, or expecting hugs, written or otherwise, you know? Yeah, I do. Life is good, it's best when it's exciting! Not when I'm telling you you rule! Let's talk about it. Why do you like purple? Have you seen this shade of orange? You don't like Italy? Have you been to Verona? Ahhh, see, you DO like Italy, you just haven't SEEN Italy. You don't like tofu? You sure? Here, try some of the Garlic Pepper Tofu from my favorite Thai restaurant. Yeah, that's tofu, can you believe it? Aha, didn't know you could actually LIKE tofu, did you? No, we don't want our personal opinions challenged, but sometimes it's a good thing to be shaken up, to realize we can open up a bit. I'm swinging back this way now. And it feels good. I'm so glad to be home. I have more errands to run tomorrow, everything I didn't do today, and the traffic shouldn't be so bad, shouldn't..., but I may just blow it all off to stay here where I feel the best. I'm learning a lot about myself, and I really like who I am. I like the way I am. I don't fault myself for the idiots out there in the world. It's not my fault they're idiots, or that they don't understand the fundamentals. It's not my place to save them. I still don't know my purpose, my life seems so futile, in general, but I know that I'm kind and generous and loving and intelligent and funny as hell, and a lot of fun to be with, and most of all, challenging. And that's fine. In fact, it's pretty great. Cost of the War in Iraq
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