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Sunday, Jul. 06, 2003 / 10:23 p.m. ~It Just Slipped Away I'm not sure why I'm bothering right now, and it's so half hearted I can't even bring myself to prepare by going in the next room to get my glasses. It's a foggy representation of my own fogginess. Three days down the drain, not wasted, but gone just the same. I'm ignoring Norman right now because she scratched and bit me, almost simultaneously, earlier, and she drew blood. I had to get up to chase her after she ran away, and give her a smack. One nasty turn deserves another, she knows this. She knows it as soon as she does it, she really does. There was no cause for it at all, and I hate it when it happens. She's sitting peacefully one moment, I move my hand the wrong way, wrong to her mind, scratch, bite, why? We don't always get along. I think the bleeding, not the cut, but the menstruation, just takes so very much out of me. I'm actually glad I had three days to laze about, to lie down, to sit here in front of the computer, and to get in two movies in spite of it all. Tomorrow is supposed to be my annual review and I dread it. To sit and have someone who is in control of my salary tell me what she thinks of me, someone who really doesn't even know me, nor work with me closely, judging me, is one of the worst experiences I can imagine. Last year was a 2% raise, if I recall correctly, and I think I blocked most of it out, except that I told a coworker after the fact, as I was appalled at the entire experience, then I was pulled aside and chastised for speaking negatively of the review. As the Englishman (as substitute for the typical 'ugly American') said in the film today, "Bollocks!". I enjoyed "L'Auberge Espagnole", and I enjoyed meeting the fellow journal writer from the Interweb, if but briefly. I got Chinese food from my favorite Chinese restaurant, and clearly it was a different cook in the kitchen today. Inconsistencies abounded. Abounded? Is that a word? They did abound. But I'll live. I'm just so sapped, it's horrible. I long for the days when I had energy to burn. I don't remember the last time I felt it. I've neglected the most basic chores for days and days, if not weeks, and I could see me slipping into a long and lasting funk, for a day or so anyway, nothing lasts too long. Ach, tomorrow will be here soon enough. I'm off to bed to sulk and watch mindless television. Oh, something I've been meaning to make note of, I enjoy the 'random entry' feature Andrew has employed recently. It's a fun way to look back on one's own diary. I haven't really seen it on too many others, nor would I take the time, probably, selfishly enough. But with my own, this is all the said 'navel gazing' after all anyway, so yeah, it's interesting, if not exactly wildly fascinating. I used to write about my job rather incessantly, or not the job itself, but the people there. Now they hold little interest. I have a new Entertainment Weekly, so tomorrow shall be spent reading about Ms Hepburn no doubt, and cursing my review and my reviewer. Cost of the War in Iraq
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