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Saturday, Mar. 29, 2008 / 2:18 a.m. ~Marking Time~ It's been three years since I wrote here about meeting Moby at the book/CD signing, and oddly enough, or perhaps not, today I listened to Moby's new album on his MySpace page, from my desk at work. I have had a new job since October of that year, aught five, though it's hardly new anymore, and my cat died (she would have been 18 years old today!), and I adopted a new cat, and life goes on. I drop in here every so often, to go back and read some of my five plus years of journaling, and to check on some of the people I once knew here, usually only to find they are still here, and little has changed for them, but their lives are so vastly different. And, usually, when I drop in, I post a little note about how odd it is to be here, which is sort of an odd exercise in itself, but I feel compelled to mark the occasion, and to post the observations, even if they are the same every time. My life? Mostly the same, some characters added, some removed. People come and they go, as I have always said, and will always say. I was dumped by the person I considered my bestest friend, and I've not really replaced her. I go to work, I come home (gasoline is too expensive to do much else), I watch TV (probably the same shows too, "Big Brother", "Survivor", "Top Chef", "Dancing With the Stars"... well, that last one is new to me, but only by a couple of years), I care for my cats, and that's about that. Of course there is the vegetarianism, approaching veganism - I'd call it about 99%, but I fear I'm in danger of approximating "99% pregnant", so I'm careful of the label. It's been a huge, yet fairly gradual, lifestyle change. I am eco-friendly, sustainable, recyclable, and one might say "green". It works for me, and I should have done it all a very long time ago. I have a new car too, also fairly eco-friendly, low emissions, excellent mileage, but it does run on fossil fuel. The job is meaningless, overall, but I feel I am there for a reason. Not that I believe there is a reason for everything, or anything really, but I believe everything I end up doing, every choice I make, or feel is made for me, is to broaden me in some way, or to strengthen me in some way. I am good at what I do, and this is recognized. In fact, I am vital, and in a way this might be just the meaning I seek. There is more, or at least I hope there is more, and as there always was, there is a sense that the 'more' will surface, in some way obvious and clear, at some point. One finds what one seeks, but only what one truly needs, when one ceases with the seeking. I think. Which goes against the 'Just do it', and 'go after what you want' mentalities, but I've never been that type of person. I have a lot more Buddhist in me than that. I try to be in harmony with life, taking what comes, being at peace with what is. Or at least that's how it feels to me, now, right now, as I write this. Life goes on, it continues, it is a fluid thing, like time. The seasons change, the sun rises and sets, the moon appears in the sky. Of course humans have fucked with the natural world to an absurd point, but life does still go on... until we're all extinct. And on that note, I see Diaryland has undergone some cosmetic changes, a few enhancements perhaps, but this web site is probably the least maintained and upgraded of any I have used in my ten years of Interweb access. It's always almost exactly the same. It just sits here, doesn't it?, static, unchanging, unmoving, with all you fine people writing away, leaving your layouts the same, just as I have here. Nothing changes here. The characters change, the people coming and going out of all of our lives, but really, all of it is exactly the same. Dear Andrew can add some boxes to the text sidebars, but it's Diaryland, and perhaps there is some comfort in that. This is about change and stasis after all. The yin and the yang of them. It all fits, doesn't it? Cost of the War in Iraq
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Recent Entries: It Was 40 Years Ago Today - 9:44 a.m. , Friday, Oct. 12, 2012 Dead Black Cat - 9:07 a.m. , Wednesday, Jan. 25, 2012 As Seen From Outer Space - 1:07 a.m. , Saturday, Dec. 05, 2009 I Survived to Tell the Tale - 7:29 a.m. , Friday, Sept. 18, 2009 Reading My Life - 12:55 p.m. , Saturday, Sept. 12, 2009 
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