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2001-12-01 / 12:54 p.m. ~Romeo Void, Debora Iyall, One of the Original Tough Women Vocalists, Lyrics, Shopping, Wanting to Forget~ I awoke with a headache. I was re-hashing it all, the party last night, the little boy, the one H. asked S. to take home, she wanted him gone, but he was nicer than her own little girl. He was friendly, creative, smart, precocious as hell sitting there with his toy cell phone, leg crossed over the other, saying things like "Hey guys, yeah, I'm here with Lilly", handing me the phone, saying it was for me. I asked her, H., said, "You don't like ____?", and she shook her head, made a face. I thought that was awful. He had given Lilly a baby doll, a large baby doll, was so excited to give it to her, and she ignored it like everything else. Later, he'd sat atop an old trunk in the living room, cradling the baby in his arms, feeding her the pretend bottle. I wanted to take a picture, but was afraid he'd be too self conscious. Lilly is violent with toys, and here was a little boy so gentle, so smart, so nurturing. But H. wanted him gone. Gladys has brought me a toy as I write this, a piece of plastic shipping material, it's what goes around a box to hold it together, to keep it from opening. She's had it for years, and she brings it to me sometimes, chews it, wants me to pat her. I'm listening to one of my favorite albums, Romeo Void's "warm, in your coat" (no caps). It's a retrospective, a best hits sort of CD. I loved them from the time they came out with "Never Say Never", back when I was in college. New Wave. Angry woman vocalist, good beats, fantastic drums, saxophone (!), great lyrics......"I might like you better if we slept together", saucy, sassy stuff. "A girl in trouble is a temororary thing", "He pushed my face down, I gave him my left knee", "Nothing makes me lonelier than a phone call to you", ugh, I love it!!! I was shocked when they split up. Also shocked when I saw a photo of Debora Iyall for the first time. She wasn't your typical rock star vocalist, she was big, a big woman, but she could sing in this sassy way, this powerful "I am woman and you are scum!" kind of way. What about "It was just too easy to break your heart"? Empowerment, revenge, strength. Or "In my dream I watched my sister fall down an elevator shaft, she was wearing her new shag haircut and the limp, white, sweater that I gave her". This music makes me want to dance, makes me feel strong, aloof, powerful. I miss her, them. I want to try to stop thinking of H. and S. and baby Lilly, the dissolution of us, the evolution of a broken relationship, a fractured friendship, how they had the wrong idea of me, how I may have misunderstood them, how there were always two of them and one of me, they were too close together for my taste, and now there are three, and the littlest is mean and angry. "This is not my idea of a good time", Debora sings....... Romeo Void's sound was totally unique, then, and especially now. Nothing like it, I love the sax, it lends a dark tone, an inner city, wandering the alleyways tone, it elicits such feeling, from me. "There's a way to walk that says 'Stay Away!'" - I always think of that when I'm out and about on my own, which is most of the time. I walk, singing that line to myself, and sing "A girl in trouble is a temporary thing - ing- ing....temporary temporary, temporary temporary.....". "She knew what she wanted, but she got what she needed"....."I was a girl who tore up the streets......house on the hill was not my dream......I was the one who had to run free, had to run 'round, nobody running with me....". And there's that scene in "Reckless", one of my favorite movies of all time, Aidan Quinn (object of a very serious crush for me, when I was in my twenties...) and Darryl Hannah. He's the bad boy, from the wrong side of the tracks, leather jacket, motorcycle, troubled home life, intense blue eyes.....wow....sexually adventurous, and she is the poor little rich girl, wanting more, wanting to leave the steel town behind, see the world, find "more".....he seduces her, she can't refuse, but it starts at the high school dance, when he takes over the turntable, puts on a record (yeah, it was vinyl back in '84, kids), and it's Romeo Void's "Never Say Never". He dances that bad boy New Wave dance, sort of bopping along to the music, he grabs Hannah, they dance together as the camera swirls around them in a big circle.... It's a fantastic movie scene. Great camera work, great song, perfect, perfect, until her boyfriend grabs her, tears the black carnation Quinn gave her from her red dress..........and she leaves with Quinn for their first motorcycle ride together into the cold night. Ahhhhhh...... "Meet me in the bathroom....don't call it a 'head'"....."The drinks aren't stiff...I know what is"......"I'll make you pay me first, you think you'll pay me last, I thought of it first, it ain't gonna last....why don't you give up on me?!". It's still early, despite how long it's taken me to finish this, to look up "Reckless" on the IMDB, to go and dance to some of my favorite songs, to write lyrics, anything to change my mood, to not think about last night. I think I'm going to see "Amelie" again today. That's my plan. Along with a visit to Pet Smart, one to Wal Mart (to get the hash browns I forgot to get the other night - they have these frozen hash browns that are amazingly good!) and a Susan Branch calendar for me (she even lists the names of each Full Moon). I am in the mood to buy things lately, I loved buying out Wal Mart, it was not totally unintentional, I want new flannel sheets now, new things, things I want, but don't need. I'm fulfilling something within me. More Romeo Void..... "Slumped by the courthouse with wind burnt skin, that man could give a fuck about your grin as you walk by, randy as a goat, he's sleeping on papers, but he'd be warm in your coat". Cost of the War in Iraq
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