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2001-10-07 / 11:29 a.m. ~Slovenly Experiments in Anti-Hygiene and Skipping a Day of Everything~ Yeah, I have PMS, I could've told you that a few days ago, right after the trip, maybe when I wanted to cry, maybe it was when I started feeling really bad that I'd never hear from Carlos....which was true. I emailed him the photo I took of him, told him how well I thought it turned out, and I guess there's something about young men and email, it's really, really hard for them to click "reply", write "thanks", and click "send". No, it's fucking impossible. Fine. Whatever (she says, defensively). Yesterday was one of those days wherein I wake up, finally, maybe 2:30 or so in the afternoon, realizing if I sleep anymore I won't get up until the next day, then I make coffee and plop down on the sofa to drink it and watch TV. Yesterday was one of those days wherein I've promised to myself that I will actually clean the apt., yes, I will organize, put away all the stuff lying around, papers, stuff, everywhere, find a place for it all, go through the newspapers for recycling, cut out the articles I want to save, and yes, it will take hours, but I will do it! I will NOT turn on the computer, no, it's a vast time-suck. So, I log on, just to check email. Uh huh. I end up reading diaries, ordering a ticket to the Thrashers' Home Season Opener, and Ticketmaster online is giving me such shit, at first I can't even tell if I actually ordered it.....server not accessible, try again....until I get a confirmation email from them. Yeah, I know how to waste a day. I am an expert at wasting time, I am the Number One Procrastinator of all time, thank you very much. Then it's a "Behind the Music" about Heart. Oh, man, I loved them when I was in high school - my best friend Kathy and I listened to their first album so much we knew every note by heart. Nancy's guitar playing, Ann's voice, Nancy's harmonies....heaven. Then, in the mid '80s, I bought "Dog and Butterfly", and again, how fucking beautiful can you get? So, yeah, I had to watch that. And well, then it was time for the hockey game, and I actually logged off the 'puter. I actually sat and actually watched my team almost go down against the big Boston bullies. They are so fucking huge! I mean one guy is 6'7" - isn't that like TOO tall? Okay, so we have speed this season, true indeed. And they high-stick our guys, one after the other crawling off the ice bleeding. That is not nice. So the new guy is kinda ugly anyway, what's a split lip? And yes, he is right back to play, with a butterfly bandage. The other stays off, poor baby, a little cut on his cheek, Stefan has always been a prima donna. He will probably miss a few games, and I will just keep making fun of him! So, this season we won't own Boston, not like the 8 goals against that one game last season. We beat them like 5 out of 5 last time. This time....um...well...we held them, matched them every early goal scored each period, then a tie, and a guaranteed point, but in OT......Hnilicka lets in a softie, right between his legs, and he stands there for a bit, looking down, looking behind him, and it's obvious he wishes he could turn back time. Yeah, that Cher song is going through his head, it's loud and he can't turn it off. "If we could turn back tiiiiiiiimmmmmmmmmme". So, we lose in OT. Um, it's early in the season? Right. Then "Aliens" is on, and why am I so sleepy? Too much tofu? Leftover Thai has filled me up and I'm lying down and there's a cat on my lap, then I pull the "throw" over me, and I have two cats joining me, not just one, and well, how could anyone stay awake? I wake up over and over again, wondering if this is okay, I never even washed my face, never even brushed my teeth today, and isn't that gross? I'm a twice a day or more person, floss at night, or after popcorn, you know, dental hygiene is more important than.....I don't know, but it's important. And I didn't shower, or take a bath. Should I admit that here? Yeah, I was dirty, okay, not like I was hiking all day and crashing in a tent dirty, but as far as lying around the apt., yeah, I could've been cleaner. And I skipped the meeting, because I didn't know if anyone was going, it didn't seem organized enough, Dianne is out of town 'til next week. I purposely watched hockey instead. And I skipped the 4th anniversary party at my favorite club, because I thought I'd feel old, the average age would be 23, I guessed, and I just wasn't in the mood to get all cleaned up, dressed up, and go someplace filled with cigarette smoke, and I knew that if no one paid attention to me my fragile little ego would be terribly wounded, especially after the Carlos thing. Yeah, I lay on the sofa, yeah, I slept there, with two cats, and a "throw" with moons and stars on it, I slept there until 5:30 or so in the morning, at which time I got up and went back to sleep, in my bed, same two cats, minus the "throw". Now it's weekend Day Two. I've achieved coffee, I've promised myself there is only one important thing I need to do online, but here I am writing in my diary. At least I did vacuum yesterday. But, jeez, I skipped my diary right along with all that hygiene. Still, it's not as bad as camping. There's not even any dirt under my fingernails. And just imagine how good it's going to feel to get in that shower and wash my hair, to floss and brush (my French ex-boyfriend, fuckhead, referred to it as "flush")..... Tonight, I'll no doubt be skipping the lectures at the girls' college. It's far away, I think, in fact I don't even know where it is. No, maybe I'll do laundry, maybe I'll listen to music instead of watching TV, maybe I'll log off this computer.....until later. Cost of the War in Iraq
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