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Saturday, Jun. 21, 2003 / 3:33 p.m. ~Happy Summer Solstice~ Happy Solstice! I just remembered, talking about lemonade with rum, and Pernod with lemonade or water, thinking of sitting on my porch with my morning/afternoon coffee, the sun shining, the trees all green, the sky a high-pressure, deep blue, wanting to get out because this weather is increasingly rare. And it is indeed the longest day of the year, so this is a good thing, if one wants more daylight, perhaps to work in the fields, or to lounge about poolside, or to be able to see, assuming one's electric is out. I've slept long and well, and hard, and now I need to be in it. I hooked the new external modem up to the 'new' PC, and it works fabulously. Since Windows is not recognizing my CD ROM drive, I downloaded the modem drivers from the manufacturer's web site last night, and all is well. Yes, I fucked up and lost all the bookmarks I'd added from July to January on this PC, but I'll live. I've decided I will live. Interweb research is incredibly easy and satisfying, so if there is anything I need to find, a quick word search will find it for me. No loss, nothing great, and the bookmarks I use now are the ones I've been using from January to now. So, um, really, I honestly can't remember what's missing. Fucking up was hard though. I was busy chastising myself all night last night. I'm too hard on myself. I'm an amazing person, quite intelligent, and I'm not ugly or funny looking, not like I think. I'm unusual, that's it. And it doesn't matter if no one appreciates me, because I came here alone, I'll leave alone, and if I stand back and just watch the world while I'm here, that's what I'm here for. Acceptance is good. It is a beautiful day. I'm taking my coffee on the porch, dragging cats behind me, or ahead, and will see movie later. Since I slept all day I should have good energy all night, and according to the planets, I'm heading into my high cycle, just in time for my annual review at work (I submitted my self evaluation yesterday, all 5s out of 5. Oh yeah, I think I'm great. 100% in the quality audits, attendance is exactly, EXACTLY 40.00 hours the last three weeks, and that's hard to do when one uses a time clock. I rule.) Life goes on. Cost of the War in Iraq
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