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Monday, Apr. 04, 2005 / 5:26 p.m. ~Stress, Heart Palpitations, Emissions Failure, #2 Girl's Birthday, and Just a Lot of Other Stuff~ There are too many places to start, and I don't know how much I can remember. No, no, nothing important, it just feels like there is a lot worth noting. For instance, I am really sick of the Mega Millions billboard along the highway mocking me. Every day it shouts out the latest absurd amount of money I have no hope of winning, even though I am far too aware you can't win if you don't play, and therefore I play, and play, and play, and I might as well just burn my small bills in a bonfire, a grand conflagration. The nights are still cool, it could be fun. I shall bring the weinies. I am now wearing shorts, and I am not cold. This can mean only one thing: it is a bit unseasonably warm today, and I've got windows open, though the pollen count is high (I can tell without an official number... I can see it!). We shall now be alternating between rain and pollen, and let's just hope the rain falls at the right time, in time to wash away the pollen when it begins to form mounds. I feel crampy. And as I'm experiencing some rather unpleasant PMS-y symptoms today, namely rather frightening heart palpitations (!!), I think I am going to follow the advice of the 'experts' and lay off all caffeine, until my 'moon time' passes. 'They' say to cease all caffeine, chocolate, alcohol, and probably sodium intake, and this means not only would women following this advice be crampy and overly emotional and miserable, but they would want for their favorite substances and thusly be even more miserable. 'Do not give in to food cravings', was what I read today, amidst my Interweb research, and I thought, "Pffft!", but then, "Eh, maybe, I could try... wouldn't kill me, right? Might even help? Right?" I've had the heart palpitations since yesterday, and I realize it could be my diet is finally bitchslapping me, the vitamins I swallow every night with my biggest meal not quite enough to keep me healthy. And hell, I'm a bit too old to think that microwave popcorn is an adequate dinner item. What is wrong with me? Anyway? I mean come on. I know I should eat the green leafy veggies, the fresh fruits, the whole grains, and blah blah and yada yada, but who's gonna shop for this crap, and who's gonna cook it, and who's gonna clean up after? Man, I'm tired. I get up early, I work... okay, I don't work hard, but I'm under a lot of stress right now (hence another reason for intense heart palpitations perhaps??), and I don't feel like doing any of the above. Plus, and this is important, I'm fucking broke. Oh, and get this, this is crucially noteworthy for today's bit of drivel as well, I finally, read FINALLY took my car for its annual emissions test today, procrastinating way past the point I should have, and here's why, because I knew I'd fail, and so, I failed, er, the car failed, but it feels personal. Twenty years, this is the first emissions failure. And I knew it, I fucking knew it. I tried to tell the mechanic dude when he was working on the noise the front axle was making, and when he put in the struts... "Hey, it puts out a lot of white smoke too - I'll never pass emissions, it smokes especially when I idle, like in rush hour traffic..." (as in, "HELP ME!), and his response was, "So, avoid rush hour traffic". No, no, no! I called him and told him, and he was appropriately sympathetic, but he is understaffed, mechanics-wise, and he can't get to it 'til Wednesday, Wednesday, what is Wednesday? Anyone? (I'm not gonna say, "Bueller?") That's right, my birthday. I have until midnight (not that tag offices are ever open past 5:00, if that) on my birthday to get my auto tag renewed, and what do I need to complete the renewal process? A passing Emissions Certificate, and I can't get that with white smoke pouring out of my car's exhaust. It's running okay though. (that should be in a much smaller font, but I've not the energy for the HTML right now - perhaps later in the entry...) Insert large sigh right here please. Maybe we can back up to yesterday now, that would be nice. Ahhhhh, yes, I was lazy, and so what's new?, I know, I know, but it was movie day, and I only watched three, but it turns out "Runaway Jury" was fun. I liked the camera work, I enjoyed the acting, though Dustin Hoffman cannot only NOT mimic a Southern accent, he cannot sustain it once he thinks he's got it. It was suspenseful, all twisty turny and such. Silly ending, I thought, I wanted more, but eh, John Grisham is all righteous and stuff. I also saw "North By Northwest", almost 100% of it this time. I'd say 99.3 percent. I've seen the whole Mount Rushmore hullabaloo more times than I can count, and it still makes my palms sweat to watch it, even if I know, I've seen the behind the scenes docu and all, that they're on a sound stage, and Eva Marie Saint is lying on that fake rock, not hanging, dangling, but I'd never seen all the other stuff, as in the whole exposition, how it happens, the everyman (surprisingly NOT played by Jimmy Stewart, but Cary Grant this time) mistaken for someone else and yanked into spy intrigue. Fun. Then the hospital evacuation docudrama, made for TNT, and some of the weirdest casting ever in Kris Kristofferson (is he okay?, he seems positively ill), "14 Hours". After a while I realized it was just dramatized evacuation of patients during a hurricane in Houston, a power outage shutting down a major hospital downtown. And I questioned why I was watching, but no more than why I purposefully chose to watch "Atomic Twister" the night before, a drama about a tornado hitting a nuclear power plant. I fell asleep during that one. Good times. I lead an exciting life. The favorite coworker asked today, "So, did you leave your apartment this weekend?", and I had to answer No, I did not, but she walked away before I could recount the intense excitement experienced falling asleep during several movies Saturday night, and waking on the sofa Sunday to watch several more. But, too much sodium was consumed, not enough magnesium (per my Interweb research - I even took a quiz at WebMD.com, with results warning me I have advanced heart disease - could it be I answered a question or two incorrectly?), and with the PMS happening, I should lay off the cream soda, as it is caffeinated - I wish they'd had cans... I had to buy a two liter jug of the stuff, just to satisfy a craving. Now I need to go off the caffeine and by the time I go back on it will be stale. Don't they make those jug plugs that keep the fizz intact while you have PMS and have to lay off the caffeinated sodas? And whose idea was it to put caffeine in fucking cream soda? Anyway? Yeah, I've used that joke already, sorry. Let's see, Mega Millions billboard, check, shorts, check, pollen, check, heart palpitations, check, failed emissions, fuck me to tears, birthday present in mail... ahhhh, we've not covered this yet. An online pal mailed me a CD. She shouldn't have, she just shouldn't have. I wasn't that thoughtful for her birthday just passed, I only mailed a birthday card she apparently never even received. I suck. No wonder I've got no friends. One final word and I imbibe a large glass of cold water (it's not just pollen-y and shorts-y, it's HOT!)... It's Gladys' 14th birthday today!!!!! So, let me find a really good picture of her to post, and I'll do that, and then I can go lie down after I drink my water. (Oh, and the heart palpitations which were rather severe earlier? They've abated, for now. I'm going to try to eat some magnesium rich foods, and lay off the stuff I mentioned, the caffeine, sodium, et al. Apparently this is a PMS symptom, and there are more than 150 documented PMS symptoms, yes, I read this, it's online, it must be true.) Okay, I realize most of my digitally available photos of Gladys suck (the flash has made her eyes look like glowing green orbs, and not in a good way), so I'll post this one of Gladys with frog, and direct anyone who cares, which hopefully will be every single person reading these words, to: Thank you, thank you very much.  Wait, wait, one more thing, I read in Sixweasels' diary about years' worth of diary entries gone with the last Diaryland crash, lost to the ether of 'cyberspace', and rushed to check my own archives only to find everything from the beginning, 05/20/01, to 01/14/03 gone! So freaked out, I hurriedly emailed our esteemed web guru and Diaryland creator, Andrew, and then and only then thought to click on the 'regenerate' link in the Diaryland news blog from days ago. Weeks ago? My diary seemed fine, I never felt the need for regeneration, but now I know I did. I feel regenerated, rejuvenated, and so thankful that is taken care of, and Andrew emailed back to reiterate said point, all is fixed. Insert one more large heaving sigh right here and I go to relax. That is all. Cost of the War in Iraq
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